Again after few weeks he said a life changing lie…. But now I know his lies had nothing to do with me as I looked at his LinkedIn profile recently and everything on there is a lie. When our son was three yrs old he cheated on me again. My husband of almost a year is a compulsive liar. After 20 yrs of living here and only just now at the age of 55 being able to get a job I find my partner telling me that he hates me every day and it is my fault for everything and he feels it necessary to lie to me — I do not know what to do.
This was the first warning sign i should have taken, he promised to get me the key to our new flat but would never give me an address or the leasing companies details claiming a small family business of course that never happened. His ex-wife had told me that he was a habitual liar and believed his own stories. And it is encouraged to do everything in your power to work on your marriage. How could there be such a person. This latest is really pissing me off. I have been married for 25 years to a generally great guy who I have loved most of my life. In fact, studies show that the effects of psychological abuse is worse than physical abuse.
Some of the lies are beyond ridiculous: he believes he went to Antarctica as a part of his military training. My kids are 20 and 21 now and I see myself living alone one day soon with an exaggerator and a compulsive liar. Are there any good books out there that can help us get through this? Compulsive liars usually experience jealousy and fear towards other people. But when I kept listening to hear and for him to tell these lies over and over again. His love, caring, passion made me blind and I believed love is more important than anything.
He even lied about his parents professiob. Small trivial unneeded lies like the sandwich thing for example — why do I care what was on his sandwich to big lies that also dont actually need to be told! He took care of her during chemo. And, ironically enough, the more destructive a relationship is, the more difficult it can be to leave it. Last week our family was on a long car ride and the topic of crazy people moving into our town came up. Rumors of him being flirtatious and ambiguous with his colleagues started coming in. He was taking a medications and injecting me In the morning and in the evening with hormones in my belly.
He confessed that he was a player and dated many girls but had changed for the better as he wants to settle down and wants to me with me. He cried … fell on my feet… promising he will never repeat. I want out but yet I have been with this man for 40 years. He lies about any and everything. I also have no friends or family to turn to. I have been married almost 50 years. He acts like the perfect husband in front of my family and people and they always tell me how am lucky to find such a good man.
I am in the middle of a divorce because of the same behavior. It was hard at first but now three years later I am enjoying being on my own and am always meeting up with friends and am sure I will meet someone else soon and this time I will listen to my gut instincts — they are usually right. Pretending that his presence does not affect me while feeling terrible inside. I dont want my kids to be another statistic of a broken home. The saddest thing to me is he will go anywhere I want and never complains. I realize this can go either way be it female or male the factor is it hurts and it hurts bad. She immediately denied that it was anything of consequence and that I am falsely accusing her.
She always lied and I have never believed anything she told me. They will still be happy while we are miserable. Of course that broke my heart and I wanted to support his therapy and recovery. Since trust is the foundation of any relationship, rebuilding that broken or decimated foundation is done brick by brick, kept promise by truth told. He started verbally abusive me and not contacting me as often. Not only did we do major remodelling of the house including the bathrooms we also relocated the bathroom.
Lying is an automatic response in every situation. I am totally financially dependent on him. Mine has a speech memorized to tell counselors when we go to therapy. I actually requested a copy of his military records from the National Archives. I worry that trying to fight this issues is gonna make me unable to ever trust again. He treats my children worse than the dogs. I am getting married to a compulsive liar in 15 weeks! In the last 2 days I have found my husband has been secretly drinking — leaving a box of wine in his car boot and drinking out of it — it was our oldest that told me he had seen him for a long time.
Instead of breaking the chain and finding ways to stop the habit, he will keep on lying to keep a women interested. Im sad fo say it, but I didnt notice the big signs, or even realize that there was a major problem until after I got married. A sad and hurtful thing but we have a lot of history and I think we could have got through it had he been able to just tell the truth. I searched his communications, tracked his car location, and all that led to is me driving myself crazy with all the lies I discovered. It really helped me to understand the effects of all types of abusive men, including pathological liars.
If you are in a relationship and you love your partner too much to let him or her go, then you might want to take a look at the signs and reasons behind being a compulsive liar: This bad habit can stem from having a very low self-confidence. I do know he could kill me and make it look like an accident. He made up such big and believable stories! When I did without mentioning the video she of course denied and castigated me for even asking her. . I confronted my htb about this and he shrugged it off with it was a joke from someone at work. He paid for me to come over as I had no where to stay…I was vunerable, perhaps if I had had more money or a friend to stay with I would have never got into this toxic relationship.